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18 Brainless Words That I Can’t Believe Are Now in the Dictionary

By October 11, 2013March 4th, 2014No Comments

This generation is committing murder every year. The Millenials are murdering the English language.

Technically, I was born just at the start of the Millenial era, but I’m taking a stand for our vocabulary—and for keeping brainless words out of the dictionary.

brainless

The Millenials have introduced new words into our vocabulary that leave you shaking your head in wonder. Most of the words don’t even make sense, and your only recourse is to head to Google to figure out what someone was just trying to tell you.

Fortunately, terms like “vacay” and “hilare” haven’t been recognized yet. But quite a few new “words” found their way into the dictionary this year. So to help you navigate the waters of 21st Century “grammar” I’ve compiled a list of a few words which have somehow found their way into the online annals of Oxford.

I’ve listed the dictionary definition exactly as Oxford states, but the italics are my own special contribution.

apols

Definition: apologies

We’re so busy as a culture that when we do wrong, we can’t even take the time to say the full phrase I A-P-O-L-O-G-I-Z-E.

babymoon

Definition: a relaxing or romantic holiday taken by parents-to-be before their baby is born

Sweet concept, but I apols for thinking that this was the new term for the moon barely being out at night.

BYOD

Pronunciation: By-odd (just kidding)
Definition: the practice of allowing the employees of an organization to use their own computers, smartphones, or other devices for work purposes

BYOD, BYOB, whatever. Still sounds like something you shouldn’t be toting along.

derp

Definition: used as a substitute for speech regarded as meaningless or stupid, or to comment on a foolish or stupid action

Goodbye DUH, hello DERP. Tell me, who’s more of a derp? The derp or the person using the word derp?

digital detox

Definition: a period of time during which a person refrains from using electronic devices such as smartphones or computers, regarded as an opportunity to reduce stress or focus on social interaction in the physical world

Mark my words, next up for our culture is rehab from technology.

double denim

Definition: a style of dress in which a denim jacket or shirt is worn with a pair of jeans or a denim skirt, often regarded as a breach of fashion etiquette

I guess I’m guilty of breaching etiquette . . . along with the rest of Texas.

fauxhawk

Definition: a hairstyle in which a section of hair running from the front to the back of the head stands erect, intended to resemble a Mohican haircut (in which the sides of the head are shaved)

Forget the faux. If you’re going to have a Mohawk at least go all out and do the real thing.

FOMO

Pronunciation: fəʊməʊ (no kidding)
Definition: anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, often aroused by posts seen on a social media website

I’m sure there are people studying in college to become psychologists who specialize in FOMO disorders. Just get off Facebook, people. Works wonders!

food baby

Definition: a protruding stomach caused by eating a large quantity of food and supposedly resembling that of a woman in the early stages of pregnancy

Speechless. Utterly speechless.

girl crush

Definition: an intense and typically non-sexual liking or admiration felt by one woman or girl for another

“Innocent” words like these are desensitizing our morals.

grats

Definition: congratulations

First, we ditched the “-lations” and shortened it down to “congrats”. Slippery slope, that butchering of language is.

jorts

Definition: denim shorts

I sincerely hope this doesn’t get wide usage. I just am not up for hearing that word on commercials or seeing it on advertisements.

me time

Definition: time spent relaxing on one’s own as opposed to working or doing things for others, seen as an opportunity to reduce stress or restore energy

Considering that a large majority of our population does this 24/7, I’m almost surprised it took this long for “me time” to get into the dictionary.

phablet

Definition: a smartphone having a screen which is intermediate in size between that of a typical smartphone and a tablet computer

Alright. I confess. I have a phablet. . . and I use this word.

selfie

Definition: a photograph that one has taken of oneself, typically one taken with a smartphone or webcam and uploaded to a social media website

Words cannot describe how much I hate this word. It’s up there with “bestie” in my book.

srsly

Definition: short for seriously

No one is going to take you seriously if you leave those vowels out.

squee

Definition: used to express great delight or excitement

See, I told you we were losing it as a generation. Whatever happened to laughing? Oh right, it changed to LOL.

unlike

Definition: withdraw one’s liking or approval of (a web page or posting on a social media website that one has previously liked)

It used to be that if you had a difference with someone, you talked it out like mature adults. Now you just unlike them on Facebook. Crazy.

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Aaress Lawless

Aaress enjoys helping small businesses and ministries, having budget travel adventures with friends, and blogging about life lessons on Instagram.

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